If you’ve ever searched online for advice about how to get a girl emotionally addicted to you, then you are definitely not alone. For some men, they’re speaking in metaphor; they just want to develop the kind of chemistry and magnetism that makes them irresistible. Others are more literal and think the only way they can get or keep a woman is
via some type of emotional or psychological trickery.
Not surprisingly, there’s plenty of self-styled ‘experts’ out there anxious to sell them advice on how to keep a girl ‘hooked’ via hypnosis, mind games, and other manipulative techniques. This article at Have You Seen Him suggests you don’t need any of that stuff to get and keep the girl you’re after.
It’s important to keep in mind that men looking for ‘emotional addiction techniques‘ are looking for a ‘shortcut’ to fix a complex problem. It’s easy to be sympathetic to men who lack the strength of identity or self-confidence to meet women. It’s much more difficult when these ‘lovelorn’ men are too lazy or impatient to do the work necessary to become a better person.
Turning to a ‘guru’ for ’emotional addiction’ guidance is like a bankrupt person calling a psychic for advice on how to win the lottery. They get the essence of the problem but still don’t understand the real reason they’re in this situation.
Addiction As A Metaphor
In most cases, the term ‘addiction’, as it relates to inter-gender relationships, is used in a symbolic manner. In a relationship with strong romantic or sexual attraction, the need of one person for the other is superficially similar to an ‘addiction’. It’s no more literal than terms like ‘head over heels’. It’s just colorful verbiage for the excitement of being in love.
Men who have experience with women understand that ‘addiction’ isn’t a literal term. Men who don’t have the strength of personality or confidence to attract women, however, don’t understand this concept.
In the same way that they try to ‘act like’ they are ‘interesting’ or an ‘alpha male,’ they misunderstand the how’s and why’s of this ersatz ‘addiction’. They mistakenly believe that a strong feeling of attraction by a woman toward a man has to be a result of emotional manipulation or similar trickery.
Addiction As A Way Of Life
The formal definition of what the term ‘addiction‘ means is a subject of continual debate among psychiatrists. The general idea, however, is that ‘addiction’ is when an inherently pleasant activity becomes a compulsion that negatively impacts a person’s well being and day to day life function.
That’s a very simplistic definition of a complex term, but it should make it evident that it’s not a healthy state of being. There’s no doubt that humans can fall prey to some form of addiction to another person. It’s also true that given the right set of circumstances a person can essentially ‘force’ someone to become addicted to them.
This type of ‘addiction’ and ‘manipulation’ is the dynamic that underpins the relationship between a pimp and his women, as well as a religious cult and its members. In both cases, they seek out people with specific vulnerabilities and then manipulatively exploit them.
It’s ethically detestable, of course, but it’s undeniable that those who can successfully do it have high levels of charisma, confidence, and an ability to quickly ‘profile’ their victims. In other words, a few tips or a ‘program’ from a dating guru won’t enable a socially awkward man to ‘manipulate’ a woman.
Addiction Doesn’t Lead To A Happy Ending
It’s virtually impossible for a person lacking in confidence to manipulate a woman into an emotional addiction. But assuming they could, then what?
The ‘end game’ is the problem that men who are awkward with woman invariably encounter. Even if they could fake, manipulate, hypnotize, or otherwise trick a woman into dating them–or even being addicted to them–at some point they’ll have to reveal themselves for who they really are.
There is a false syllogism implicit in the ‘techniques’ and ‘systems’ from most dating gurus. The gullible and desperate men who ‘buy in’ to them are hoping that by imitating certain characteristics of men with a strong sense of identity, they’ll become one themselves.
It doesn’t work that way–you can only ‘act’ self-assured and socially fluent for so long unless there’s legitimate substance behind it.