“Will my ex come back and what are the chances of getting back together with my ex after a breakup?” If you’re going through a breakup right now, I’m sure this question (or a variation thereof) has crossed your mind. For example…
Will my ex come back…
- …after no contact?
- …after 6 months?
- …if I give him space?
- …if I give her space?
Unfortunately, there’s no easy answer. Well, there is, but you aren’t going to like it. The easy answer is, “It depends”. It always depends because every single relationship and every single breakup is different and has its own set of unique problems, circumstances, etc.
However, there are certain factors that make it more likely or less likely your relationship can be salvaged. Here are 5 of the most important ones.
When Did Your Breakup Occur?
Was it yesterday? A week ago? 3 months ago? A decade ago?
Repairing relationships after years of being apart does happen, but it’s not a common occurrence. You’re much more likely to repair your relationship if your breakup happened within the past few months. Emotions are fresh. Memories are fresh. The longer the time gap, the harder it will be to reconnect.
How Long Were You Together?
A long-term relationship is typically easier to get back than a short-term one. Why? Because it’s hard to replace the type of bond that forms in a couple with lots of history together.
Let’s face it, dating someone new is always kind of weird and awkward at first. It takes a while to learn each other’s tendencies and settle into habits together. It’s difficult to form a happy relationship with someone that lasts for years. So if you and your ex have been together for a long time, it works in your favor and you have a better chance of getting him or her back.
Why Did You Break Up?
This one is pretty simple to understand. The more “fixable” your problems are, the greater the chance of getting your ex back. For example, was it one argument that led to the breakup? Was it one single event that can be changed? Was there one pattern of behavior or “sticking point” that could be fixed with some counseling?
It will be much easier to get your ex back if the problems in the relationship are things that can be resolved. If the two of you don’t agree on anything anymore or have grown in two different directions over the years, then you may be two completely different people that simply aren’t a good fit anymore. Likewise, something like cheating or abuse may not be fixable in your ex’s opinion. In that case, you’ll need to accept their decision, let them go, and move on.
Is Your Ex Apathetic Toward You?
Hate is not the opposite of love. Apathy is. You’re much more likely to get your ex back if they show strong emotion toward you (even if those emotions are negative), then you are if they show no emotion toward you at all. If you don’t raise their emotional intensity level (good or bad), then they’ve probably already moved on, and it won’t be worth it to try and win them back.
To learn how to take your ex’s strong negative emotions and channel them back toward something positive for your relationship, watch this video or click here to read about Michael Fiore’s Text Your Ex Back program.
What Do You Both Want From Life?
It’s guaranteed you and your ex are not the same two people you were when you first got together. As humans, we continually grow and evolve. Sometimes we grow together. Other times we grow apart.
Your ex is more likely to come back to you if you currently share the same life goals. If, on the other hand, you’re ready for children, but your ex is extremely focused on a career, then it may never work out. You need more than just chemistry. You also need timing. And, as they say, “Timing is a real bitch.”